shot of milk

Bartender poured this cat a shot of milk in New Orleans

Lick Myself

I don't always do stupid mistakes But when i do, I act like it never happened and lick myself

pull the plug

whatever you do, DON't pull the plug again!

Moron

This needs a major rewrite - Is English your second language and Moron your first?

Hoarding

My cats face when I found one of her Hording Stashes...

Family Thing

"This whole family thing is not really working for me."

Out of Bed

Getting kids out of bed and ready for school isn't easy for any family.

Stuff

I'm done buying stuff for my cat

family jewels

Only a cat could look elegant lying on a trash bin, giving the family jewels a wash.

Jenkins

Jenkins buy me an expensive cat bed I'd like to sleep in the box it came in

Roses are Red

Roses are Red, VIOLETS are blue. I HATE YOU...

at you

Don't get too excited I'm purring at you not with you

Early Today

Oh.... you came home early today

get-up-and-go

My get-up-and-go got up and went without me

sexy as hell

Holy Crap - I'm Sexy As Hell

saddest song

I Haven't Eaten in over 20 minutes

Best Dog

Best Dog Ever...

hey human

Hey Human! What are you doing?

Thinks & Does

What my cat thinks he is doing.. What he actually does.

before bed

What i see every night before bed...

Home early

OH HI... You're home early.